I haven't had sex since January 17th when I was with Morpheus. I think about how much this illness has changed me, how much telling his wife has changed me, and how much I'm sheltering myself from the rest of the world.
I don't even remember kissing the District Training Manager or Chase.
I have closed myself off from any kind of romantic attachment. I write my letters to Morpheus saying I'm in "search for closure," but the search seems far from being over. I hate being touched--I shutter to it--there's a chill that comes as a wave over my body.
It's an understandable reaction to have, when you've been hurt as deeply as you have.
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