"You are so critical, and so demanding and so pushy..." My grandmother said to me this morning over the phone. x. "I have to watch everything I say."

I can help but think this is because I was psychotic and drove her to the last of her patience. x. d.o.

I tried to talk back to her over the phone, but found my words slipping away, from my tongue out into the never-land, away, certainly not to her. But clearly in my brain, I gather a good argument how I could not be compared to a homeless woman living on the streets with cats.

"If I have to get a dictionary every time I talk to you, we just shouldn't talk," she threatens. d

o. I can barely speak or write or think anymore. I expect people to be understand. Expect is a big word, and don't I expect too much? NO.