You WAnt The LIes

The height of my sanity was outside of a Mexican bar in Cambria. Pacing up and down the sidewalk. AT eleven. WAiting for it to opene. So I could fuckkng get drunk. a. That was probably two months ago. I was losing my mind.

I was obnoxious at the bar.

I found blood in my mouth in the bathroom after I started to eat. Anticoagulant. Many of them exist. a. YOu get into a car accident. Bumped. Tossed aroundd. YOu die very easily. Bleed out. Acute anemia. I just drank. a.

dying? Who cares about dying? From some rare derivative of snake venom? Put in your juice every morning?

I wait for the ears . The nose. Constant. The exciting stuff. The Mayo Clinic stuff. a. "Buttercup."

"Jack...Jack..." I cry. At the bar. Back then, everyone was nicer. ON the phone.

If you die, you want to die nicely. With someone whispering in your ear, "Buttercup."

If you die, ou want to die with lies. Not the truth.

YOu want the truth about someone else, never yourself. NEver about your relationship iwth yourself or the person you love the most. Jack. Morpheus. NO. d.

If you're dying, you want to keep the lies. Lies protect you. Lies keep you safe in here.

"If you had a week to live, what woudl you do?"

"yOu're not going to die! "

I could! I could die! d

You pretended never to love me ,that is safe. You like it like that. I pretended too . I loved my blog and in that blog ,I loved you, you dont' know .

butttercup.

Was said by awoman. d

But my crime I loved you in my blog, and in my blog, you lvoed me back. And they didn't love all that shit.

NO. d

You don't get to say.

YOu want the truth on your strongest day, on the day when it will count for someting.

"I lied because if I told you the truth, that I really did actually love you, then it would hurt more when I couldn't see you because of my job." That's a good lie. Even then, d you still cry. A lot.

YOu didn't do this--

YOu didn't show up when--

You never told me this here and here and there too--

I still love you more--I was bit by the imaginary bug for haivng dream about you--

NO. YOu lie. That was a bug.

There's no way to re-write the stoyr, and make anyone a winner. I tried.