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One of the more obvious bents is the more you talk about what's going on, the worse your diagnosis will be.

This could be the sole retaliation for going down to the FBI.

My lack of education and the fact that I never figured out who was behind even a part of it could play into this. While the FBI is the FBI (aren't they the ones who are supposed to do this?), I fear a further loss of control.

I was essentially running my own private investigation, however poorly .

One doctor mocked a woman who kept detailed records, every day, of what her husband was doing, bcause he was "playing games with her" through their separation. The doctor gave her a delusional diagnosis.

I have multiple files for some days. Pages and pages and pages .

I can't imagine the FBI looking at any of it. It's worthless. The real evidence is the stuff I have no ability to use. Because I don't have the knowledge to wield.

If anything it's a breakdown of my own terror. YOu can admit to terror, if you do so bravely.

If you do so in the face of those who mean to terrorize you.